Meltdown

Wandering along

in a world of reel to reel

trapped inside an analytical brain

with feelings half concealed

Does not compute

but does dispute

what is said; so reputed

felt is so much

and then your touch

can turn me to ice

though I am nice

Pushing to reciprocate

bowing down to replicate

I try so hard..

so do not hate

or is it me that hates it so?

I don't have a bow

upon my head

and sometimes, inside

I am nearly dead

and I just want to lie in bed

and shut it all out

or play my music 'til it

drowns the drought

The hole in my heart

where I need to put art

which would save me and

stop all the demands

For things in which I cannot keep up with

anymore

I want to slam the door

and be j'adore

to art alone

But I cannot completely leave

for I would grieve

the other things I love

though it can be so rough..

I pray to up above

Please, lift this astigmatism

pouring into me, as rheumatism

ravaging my body

from copying the copy

like a hard drive head

with a heart on my sleeve

allergic to the air I breathe

like an alien, shipwrecked

Sometimes it does feel like a curse

of trapped; like feelings in a purple purse

all through my system

and I wish it would stop

I have to pray for the vision

before the raindrops

Fall down my cheeks again

while I'm fighting the process

till I'm rocking and I’m copping

out, like a broken machine

maybe I am now off the beam

Oh, I curse my brain today!

'cause I want to see the way

...I don't want to run away….

but be this way, it may

December 22nd, 2012

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