Friday, August 16, 2013

Rise Above

Rise Above

Broken open
by a gash so deep

walking wounded
and for weeks couldn't sleep

Not without nightmares

as I cried out in vain

"how could this happen again?!
opened up, is all the pain

The mirror held up to my face

lay shattered on the floor

my body sprawled upon the glass

infected, sick, and sore

I stared up at the ceiling

and saw the outlined wings

of an angel hovering, and singing

"A message I shall bring"

The message said; “you love so deep

that you count stars instead of sheep

amongst those stars you see Gods' face

and all the human lies’ disgrace

and though, my dear, you fell from grace

at the devils hands
you can command your final hand
you can refuse to be a victim

You can find yourself once again

to be your "rainbow from the rain"

you asked us once to bring you one

but we said with fate you're not done

Until you see the truth, behold

the true rainbow with colours bold

Each colour now, belongs to you

so be no more, on your head, a shoe

For that shoe just revealed it's true

reason why it intends to do

the act of darkness, inflicted upon you

the machine guns held up, to disarm you

Be not afraid of the firing range

you're bulletproof, if indeed you change

into the light warrior meant to be

coming in peace, shielding the tree

Stand strong with the light

and hurt you will not

without fire, fight

with the heart that you've brought

Into your deepest desire

for in which they call you a liar

rise above them, even higher

hear not the attempts to lower
rise higher!

Be with all good souls in Heaven above

Be with all good souls in the Power of Love

and Love Thy Enemy, without disdain

and you'll be the rainbow from the rain

Shining upon, having mercy below

for those who commit acts oh so low

for true love they will never show
and sadly they may never know

Such is that is the tragedy belonging to they

who make innocents their gamely prey

pity them, for what they will never know

yes, rise and shine, upon them below

Believe in yourself, your truth and you'll be

able to shield every standing tree

from systems with an axe to grind

and you may warm the hurt we find

Upon other light warriors too

whom on their heads, there stomps a shoe

So rise above
hold out your hand and pull them out
from the quicksand

So they don't disappear, in abyss

so they'll live in a peaceful bliss

You broke open to hurt and know

what's tried to have you sink below

and all the pieces you split into

revealed the colours, living all through you

The colours of love, the colours of truth

forget the kettle black which calls you uncouth

and now you know why, once and for all

so rise above the battle call

And hold your heart and head up high

and shine upon a cloudy sky

until the clouds part once again

for you be that rainbow from the rain

When you bring your colours all together

in the aftermath of the stormy weather

yes, you break wide open, as a being of light

so split into that rainbow bright!

All colours confused... come together again

in love and light, be eternally sane

forever without crying in vain

forever without affliction and pain

August 16th, 2013


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Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Meant To Be

I'll keep reaching
no matter what
I'll keep searching
for an out, from this rut

Not a rut of mine
but from being entwined
with barriers
in which seem oh so endless
And fog up my vision
lucky I have precision
in all that I do
and a heart that is true
but I need something more
as I grapple to keep score
against a great Goliath
I'm a mouse to a lion

Constantly sticking out my tongue
being threatened to be hung
like in the days of Salem
you could say, I suppose
on hot coals are my toes

As I walk across, they burn
and I'm squinting
to see the next right turn
though half the time, there's a blockade
and though my brain, the way it's built
is challenged with being unafraid
I have no choice
if I want to survive
to believe in my instincts
deep down inside...

They tell me to hang on;
and love for destiny
My logic can argue,
though paradoxically

I question; if one is born
with a certain feeling
which lives so strongly
inside of thee

Then maybe
JUST maybe...
it IS “meant to be”?

July 10, 2013

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Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Little Eyes

Oh, Little eyes
I love you
and I be thinking of you
all the time, deep within my soul
although I may seem on a roll
forgive me
when I'm on a train
I'm praying
it won't be in vain
and I may leave you something special
no matter what happens to me
I want to take you to a tree
and hold you beneath the branches
if only, for just one time
we could look up at the sky
I love you much more than you know
Little eyes

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Is it just a dream...

Will it ever be real
or is it just a dream?
i'm stuck in a machine
that is failing me
albeit not even that
being believed..

and could i make it all work better
if i only knew how
part of me wants to take a bow
and out
from trying

why did life seem to bring
all these challenges to me
when all i've ever wanted
is to simply be happy
oh was it just a dream
that my own song, i did sing
clad in glitter and feathers
and fitted jeans, and leather...

but i am breathing weak
and i am scared, to the brink
i feel that i may sink
'cause i don't have the answers why
and this public system, i cannot rely
i fear too much time will pass me by
before they see what I say is not a lie!

can i keep on swimming
in this ocean dark and deep
i cannot see a beacon
should i just go to sleep

but i feel, that if i sleep
i may never wake again
so i'm still reaching out with might
for the rainbow from the rain

oh, is it all a fantasy
and not really a destiny
i'm hanging on.. and we shall see
and I'll sing in my dreams
and I'll pray for moonbeams

to shine upon
and light the way
maybe until
the darkened days
into a peace
at least, in some way

whatever way
I do not know
although I'll pray
and keep the faith
so that if I don't make it
I'm smiling
under a blanket

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Friday, June 7, 2013

I Only Have Room To Believe

This is about the psychiatrist who abused me in february 2013 (ie.“Breaking My Silence”) by blacklisting me in the system whence writing very serious, untrue things in my public file. This shut me out from getting any help or being believed by doctors, and caused me to have to defend myself while sick. I fought to receive my rightful diagnosis of a health condition which turns out to be more serious than fibromyalgia. Though my case was eventually proven, this had to happen in another country.

She broke me wide open
but I gotta get up
She tore up everything thing I stood for
yeah, she roughed me up

She looked me down
with her beady eyes
her grey-souled mind
said I'm made of lies

Because I express differently
and confidently
and though I was in distress...
she misconstrued my request
she made an awful mess
My heart then shattered into glass
shards, flying around me
and as I walked, they cut my soul
and then took such a wretched toll

For weeks and weeks and weeks
because she's in a seat
of power, in her hierarchy
I let her nearly kill me

But maybe; it’s meant to be
that I now stand up and fight
and no, not with strife
truth I live
in this life!

Refusing to sink, into the sand
but rather be heard, my heart by my words
revealing the truth, I must demand

That people know
how the neuro-different fare
at the hands
of current ignorance

In which is so endemic
and oppressive to We
am I to suffer
so that they see?

Can I be strong, entwined with plight
to seek justice, to make this right
for the sake of the divergent song
for the chorus of the neuro-different; wronged
are We, and We are everywhere
and We have much to give!
but We are afflicted; targeted
by the ways, in which this world lives...

Oh, dear Lord above; am I strong enough
to Banish lately cursed nights....
which only grossly weaken me
from rising with the right kind of fight

I must rise up; from this downward spiral
and make my message viral
pushing everything that hurts me; OFF...
I'm coming back home! ...after I mop

The blood that was spilt
now, my body; Be rebuilt

Oh; I love so much!
it's this a sociopath can't stand
and though I've been far from perfect
I've made tools that I must work with

I'll pray to The Universe; for clarity and strength
to mend from broken and weakened
to see past barriers that block the beacon

Though on the brink
I don't give up easily
yes, many attack the sensitive, the weak
adding insult to injury

But did she in fact wake up a beast?
that was sleeping
deep down inside of me
and now; can I be David?
can I slay the monster before me?

My reiki master told me
that it is meant to be …

And though I'm scared
deep down I believe
in miracles, in reprieve

The impossible can be achieved
there just is no more time to grieve
I only have room to Believe

June 5th 2013

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Wednesday, May 8, 2013

This Tree

Feeling it all
as it flows through my veins
like acid rain
upon my soul

What is my roll
and how i came to be
so broken like this
crying under this tree

In my dreams, from above
yes, until there are doves..
she whispers her rhyme
and her leaves
shed in time

Till a barren trunk
stands amongst the cold
oh yes, there she stands
so still and so bold

While keeping her roots
solid in the ground
until she had found
the sunlight, shining

And though she's not pining
and now just standing still
and so I do ask
why is she not ill?

Even though they've cut down
and all her family...

Take a leaf from this tree”
she whispers to me
you keep this one leaf
love me still
when you were a child
over we, you did grieve
our remaining stumps
were your tears, we received”

And this is one of my first memories
and maybe a message
of how to be freed
I'm hanging on dearly
amidst the cold breeze
I just want to please
but who; I'm asking...

Is it merely me
or can I simply be
and how can I too
be free
like this tree?

May 8th, 2013

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Tuesday, April 23, 2013

The Ground That Holds A Million Tears

Pieces of a memory
way down here
on the ground below
that holds a million tears

Shattered heart and soul
mended together still
but it takes a toll
holding together
with a pill
Managing to scrape
at the bottom of the barrel
even better standards still
cherry picking, like a hunt

Even though there are the runts
being pushed around
or, being pushed down
I don't know anymore

It's a game; to keep score
surviving with the petals
when problems are ignored
and pacified to settle

Boiling like a kettle
of secrets underneath
though hidden in a sheath
so hidden in a sheath..

April 23rd, 2013

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